More Struggling

Mariam’s marriage to Rasheed is her most difficult struggle so far. After her mother Nana died and her father Jalil practically disowned her, Mariam had no choice but to obey Jalil and get married. A woman living alone and supporting herself was not an option in Afghanistan—or at least not for her. She did not love Rasheed, and “most of the days, Mariam stayed in bed, feeling adrift and forlorn” (56). At first, she dealt with her struggle by mourning and keeping to herself. The only thing Mariam learned from wallowing was that if she gave up on her life, it would be like that forever. However, after a while, Mariam decided to make the best of her situation. She got out of bed and began to clean the house. She made dinner that night for Rasheed, and when he liked it, Mariam felt like “a flare of pride caught her off guard. She had done well—maybe better than good, even—and it surprised her, this thrill she felt over his small compliment” (62). I’m not sure if their relationship reached the point of love, but the Mariam and Rasheed lived harmoniously for the most part. They learned to appreciate each other. From this, Mariam learned that she could rise above almost anything if she tried.
Rasheed has faced multiple struggles throughout his adult life. His former wife died years ago, which is why he is now married to Mariam. So, for starters, had to deal with the death of a family member. Whether he truly loved her or not, we can’t know for sure. No matter how many times the two of them try, Rasheed and Mariam are not able to have a child. In the result of Mariam’s several miscarriages, Rasheed yells at her and makes her life miserable. Mariam feels extremely guilty and thinks, “in the most essential way, she had failed him—seven times she had failed him—and now she was nothing but a burden to him. She could see it in the way he looked at her” (90). Rasheed overreacts to the point where he causes Mariam serious physical pain. He forces small pebbles into her mouth and makes her chew them until her molars break.